A New Chapter

I haven’t written for a few weeks.  My first non-fiction book came out and I have been trying to figure out how to market it.  That is the hard part.

It was within these walls that I wrote and published my first book, it was a children’s book inspired by my daughter.  I will never forget sitting in my office reading the email that told me my book had been accepted.  My daughter was so happy for me.  I couldn’t believe it.  I was actually going to be a published author.  Now I have written a second book.

These walls have bore witness to so much that has been good in my life as well as so much that has been bad.  I will have left a lot of memories etched in these walls, much more than anyone else who lived here before me because my family has been here the longest.  It has been a hard road at times but totally worth it at others.

This house will be missed but not the memories as those will always be with me and new ones created between new walls and new chapters written.

Disney

A week had gone by, the whole family was in DisneyWorld including her sister and sick mother.  Her mom had cancer and had decided not to continue with chemo.  The one thing her mom wanted to do was go to Disney with her grandkids.  The plan had been made months before when she was dong fine.  She had been going down hill quickly, nobody knew just how quick.

She wasn’t sure if she should even make the trip but her kids told her she should.  No reason to sit around the house by herself when she could be enjoying the warm Florida weather and Disney.  She was hesitant but ultimately decided to make the trip.  It had started out ok but it was obvious each day that she was going downhill.  Halfway through the trip her sister had called to tell her that her mom’s doctor had called, it was fine for her to finish the trip but she needed to check herself into the hospital the minute she got back, something was wrong.

By the last day of the trip she was barely able to move but she had to get back home.  She boarded the plane for Iowa and they boarded the plane for Colorado.  They were barely home an hour when they got the call.  Her sister and her mother were in Detroit on their layover, her mom was very sick and they would not allow her to board her next flight, she had to go to the hospital, she needed to get their quick.

 

The Final Countdown

2018 is here and this is my final year.

It won’t be long now and I can’t help but wonder, how did I get here – how?

So much has happened, it has gone so fast, soon I will be gone and this will be my past.

So I’ll continue to write as I say goodbye

It won’t be easy but it must be done.

 

Last New Year

For most of the year things had not been going well, the drinking was getting worse and worse and he wasn’t even making much of an effort to hide it anymore.

In July she lost her wedding ring, she almost made no effort to try and find it.  November brought her knee surgery which he chose to use as an excuse not to go to work and stay home and drink instead under the guise that he was caring for her.  Christmas in Mexico only weeks after her surgery.  She couldn’t walk much and instead of helping her out….

Finally the end of the year.  The few days leading up to New Years was horrible.  He kept finding excuses to leave the house and would then go to the local bar and throwback shots.  His car broke down at one point and she had to go pick him up.  He was drunk, an empty vodka bottle laying on the floor of his car in plain site.  They got into a huge fight.

The next day was the last football game of the year.  Why she let him drive is unknown to her.  They fought in the car and he nearly caused a fatal accident.  In the stadium he fell onto the row of people in front of them and eventually passed out in his seat.

The drive home was silent except for these words she finally uttered “I think we need to separate”  That was the beginning of the end.  This house would never be the same.

My Divorce Coach Intl.

 

 

Last Christmas

There have been 16 Christmas’ in this house.

There have been up to 15 family members here at once to celebrate on Christmas day.

Three of those family members have now passed.

One no longer lives here and one now only lives here a few months out of the year.

Hundreds of presents have been given and received.

One bout of food poisoning, one oven on fire, one garbage disposal destroyed, several glasses of wine spilled on the carpet, laughter filling the house, several dogs, one cat and a few fish also participated.

20 inches of snow, no snow and 60 degrees.  Stockings hung and filled with toys, a packed house filled with joy.

An artificial tree every year but one, different ornaments every year.

This house will be missed at Christmas time.  This is the last place I spent Christmas with my mom it will be hard to leave that memory behind.

The memories made and family members now departed will forever be etched in these walls.  New memories will be made in new walls but their presence will always be felt as new family members gather and presents are exchanged.

My Divorce Coach Intl.

 

 

The Christmas Ornament

Her mom died that year.  Christmas was always over the top for her mom, it was her favorite time of year and she loved, loved, loved to decorate.  Her mom had several key pieces that she put out every year, so when her mom died there were five specific pieces that all the girls wanted.  Since there were five girls it worked out well for each girl to get one piece, but it wasn’t quite that easy.

The plan was for everyone to put their name in a hat for each piece they wanted, if your name was drawn that was your decoration.  It started out fine until one of the sisters had her name drawn for two different pieces.  Since they hadn’t talked about it and just assumed everyone would walk away with one ornament it was a bit of a surprise, but not a total surprise, that she refused to give up either piece and instead allowed one sister to walk away with nothing.

These pieces had been in the family for years and they were the one significant thing that reminded the girls of their mother and allowed her to share the holiday with them every year.

Now the first ornament on her tree each year is the breast cancer heart in memory of her mom, then her mother’s Christmas decoration which she just so happened to purchase while she was visiting her in Colorado and finally her grandmother’s Santa Claus.  Even though her mother and grandmother have long since passed, they are still apart of her Christmas every year.

My Divorce Coach Intl.

The Burbs

 

The kids were on a “track” system at school, which meant they had almost a full month off over Christmas.  This was a great time to plan a trip to DisneyWorld and that is exactly what she was doing when the shots rang out.

The house is in the burbs in a usually uneventful cul de sac filled with kids.  The neighbors behind them insisted on setting off fireworks year round and so she did not think anything of it when she heard the pop, pop, pop.  There go the neighbors again she thought and thought no more of it, until the doorbell rang.

The two cops stood at her door wanting to know if she had heard the gunshots earlier.  Gunshots? You mean that wasn’t fireworks? No ma’m, there was a drive by shooting two doors down and got one of your neighbors.  I guess DisneyWorld is going to have to wait.

The In-Laws

His family was here, again.  She did not get along with his family and did not want to deal with her mother in law, but what choice did she have. It wasn’t about her, they were his parents and the kids grandparents.  She could handle anything for a few days as long as there was wine and Xanax.  But this was never good.

Her mother in law in her infinite wisdom, decided to stuff the garbage disposal with potato peelings without running it.  Of course when she finally turned it on, peelings flew out and covered the walls, the disposal made some awful noises, an electrical smell wafted through the air and eventually it whirred to a stop never to be heard from again.

Her father in law decided he was going to get drunk and start a fire in the oven.  He decided he wanted toast and rather than going the normal boring route of using the toaster he decided it would be more fun to put it in the broiler and forget about it while he was outside smoking.  Oven – ruined.

And then came the car, the brand new car – not so new anymore, not much of a car anymore.  Thank you for coming.

My Divorce Coach Intl

The Violin

She was only 5 but she was determined to play the violin.  Where in the world did she get the idea that this was something that would make her happy.  She knew no one that played.  She had never even seen or heard one as far as her mother knew.  Despite that, she asked for a violin and lessons everyday for almost six months.  She was relentless, and then it happened, the day her mom finally agreed.

Music filled the house on a daily basis after that.  She played from kindergarten all the way through high school.  She played on the same stage as the Beatles, U2, Bob Dylan and Beyonce.  It was her dream and she lived it.

My Divorce Coach Intl

Oh Christmas Tree

Thanksgiving is barely over and the kids are begging for the tree to be put up.  She had just had surgery on her knee the week before.  There wasn’t a lot she could do.  Even though his mom was visiting it was she who was somehow was still responsible for cooking the meal even though she could barely stand.  But when it came time for the tree she had to draw the line.

He had to help, bring the tree up from the basement and set it up, that’s all he needed to do.  The kids were excited, they wanted to help.  Once again he was inebriated and only half functioning.  The tree went up and then bam! It came down in spectacular fashion with him on top of it.

My Divorce Coach Intl.